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Elise Heerde
Meet Elise
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Consulting
After The Exit
Holy Hell
Faith After Control
Holy Hell: Saved So Hard I Needed Therapy
After The Exit: Coercive Control
Little Book of Sarcasm
Resources
RTC
Blog
Contact Me
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Elise Heerde

Elise Heerde acknowledges the Wurundjeri People of the Kulin Nation as the Traditional Custodians of the land on which I live and work. I pay deep respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander Elders, past, present, and emerging. I honour their enduring connection to land, waters, culture, and community and acknowledge that this always was, and always will be, Aboriginal land.

Elise Heerde is inclusive of all individuals within the LGBTQIA+ Community. That means celebrating and affirming every LGBTQIA+ identity and showing love and respect for everyone's abilities, cultures, faiths, and bodies. Everyone's unique journey is valued and welcomed with open arms.

They call deconstruction a phase because they need you to come back. If it's just a stage, just a little rebellion, just some doubt you'll work through, then the system stays intact. You'll realise you were wrong, you'll repent, you'll return.

🌱 Bu
I used to think I was the problem.

That my panic attacks meant I wasn't praying enough. That my exhaustion was a spiritual test. That my questions were evidence of rebellion.

Turns out, I wasn't broken, I was just deeply conditioned by a high-contr
If you've ever wondered why you're not "over it" yet, why your body still reacts as though danger is present, or why freedom feels disorienting instead of liberating - you're not alone.

After the Exit: The Long Tail of Coercive Control is
If everyone who called you family stops speaking to you the moment you stop attending, it was never community.

It was a compliance structure with friendship as the incentive.

❗️Real connection survives disagreement, distance, and diverging beliefs.
If you've ever felt like you lost yourself inside a group, a belief system, a church, a community, or a leader — this page is for you.

Hi, I'm Elise. I'm a mental health practitioner, certified coach, author, and someone who has lived through

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Elise Heerde is a certified practitioner of Havening Techniques. Havening Techniques is a registered trademark of Ronald Ruden, 15 East 91st Street, New York. www.havening.org